Otter Island Episode 3 Peals of Thunder Oren Otter: Narrator Oren Grant Tim Eala Dubh: Olivia (a toon, but a little more serious than her sister, Ophelia) Nageel 1 emperor (oily and evil) Tak Kaninus: Gabriel (the winged mutant. Speaks very coolly) Malcrum (Battered old warrior. Deep voice) Jude the Rat: Poffle (Cookiesnitcher. Very self-confident and hyper) Nageel 2 Brim Ashen Fox: king (very informal, speaks to others as equals) Nageel 3 Kemal (traitor, but convinced he's doing the right thing. Speaks with false confidence.) Wanderer: cook (simple country fellow) nageel 5 Ann Vole: doctor (mildly annoyed) Rio Time Lord: Braze (semi-feral. Speaks in a half-growl.) nageel 4 Martin Billany: nageel 6 Guard Phyllis Vary: Mother (worried about Tim) (Nageel grunts should all be played as cutthroats and scumbags.) (Introduction) Narrator 001: Welcome to a place unlike any other, a living island. A magical, mysterious land far across the sea, where human beings are only visitors. Home to a civilization of strange and wondous animals. Gateway to hundreds of millions of other dimensions. Welcome to Otter Island. Narrator 002: Somewhere on this island, children are at play. Parents are enjoying a quiet moment, sharing a picnic lunch and watching the otterflies flutter by. This is not that happy place. sfx: thunderstorm narrator 003: This is the fjord Village, and it is under attack. Grant 001: This is your last warning! Leave now, and you may yet live. Remain on this island and you will die. Nageel 1 001: We will not leave, river dog! This island belongs to the nageel, and we will reclaim it once again. Nageel 2 001: Our emperor gave it to us for a place to walk in man form. Grant 002: (quietly) Gabriel, how many nageel can you take? Gabriel 001: I can't fly as well in the rain, Grant. I might be able to take six. Grant 003: You take the left. Olivia, take the six on the right. Poffle... Poffle: YAAAAAAAARGH! Grant 004: All right, then. You take the twenty in the center. sfx: Battle sounds nageel 1 002: You will die at my hands, vermin female! sfx: electricity Olivia 001: BbBbBbBbBbBbBb! nageel 1 003: You are unharmed? What trickery is this? My electric shock is enough to kill ten otters! Olivia 002: Ten otters, maybe, but not one very determined toon. GIANT WOODEN MALLET OF DOOM! sfx: chipmunk laughing, cartoon hammer, pots and pans crash Grant 005: Gabriel, behind you! sfx: arrow whooshing by Gabriel 002: Arrows? Since wheen do nageels use arrows? Nageel 3 001: Hold still you mangy anim... URF! Grant 006: I think that's all of them. Poffle: No nageel meets Poffle twice! Gabriel 003: (condescendingly) yes, Poffle. We know. Olivia 003: That was a little harder than usual. Grant 007: I think we all know why. Olivia 004: We do? Grant 008: This is Pama's village. Gabriel 004: Grant, you can't keep going on about Pama. Pama's gone. Grant 009: (snips) I am very much aware of that. Olivia 005: He's right, you know. Pama's passed on. You've got to let him go. Grant 010: Hmph. I'll let it go when the Fjord village has a new defender. Pama's death has left it far too vulnerable to attack. The current situation is intolerable. Poffle: Are you going to tell Malcrum that? Because I wouldn't. Grant 011: You let me worry about what I'm going to say to Malcrum. Scene 2 (Interior) Narrator 004: Meanwhile, in a distant dimension, a young mechanoid is preparing for a trip. Tim 001: All right, then... I've got fuel... lubricant... eye cleaner... eyeballs... where did I put my extra eyeballs? Oh. Here they are, inside my extra feet. Mother 001: Timothy? Are you finished packing, dear? Tim 002: Almost, mother! Mother 002: Did you remember to pack an extra pair of eyes? You know you can't get new eyes out there in the wilderness. Tim 003: It's not wilderness, Mom. Just because Otter Island isn't as advanced as city zero-one-five doesn't mean they're savages. Mother 003: I know, Tim. It's just that... Tim 004: And yes, I did. Mother 004: Good. Don't want you going blind because you can't get parts. Did you pack an extra pair of feet? Tim 005: (getting impatient) Yeesss, mother! Mother 005: (babbling a bit) You don't have to go, you know. I mean, just because you're lutraform... You don't even have to stay lutraform. I'm willing to pay for an upgrade if you want one. Your uncle Trip is quite happy as a stationary system, for example... Tim 006: Mom, I know how you feel about my going away, but this is my choice. I'm the one who chose to be shaped like an otter. Mother 006: (deflating) I know... Tim 007: And I want to go live with the otters because... well, because they like to learn and explore. City 015... Our entire world even... it's just so stagnant. Mother 007: If you want adventure, city zero-two-zero is having a military recruiting drive. You could see the... Tim 008: (interupting) MOTH-er... Mother 008: Sorry. It's just that I worry about you. I built you with my own hands. I don't want anything to happen to you. Tim 009: And so you'd rather I go into the army than live among otters? Mother 009: (sheepish) That was pretty silly, wasn't it. Tim 010: I love you, Mom. I'll come back to visit, I promise. Mother 010: Your ride is here. Remember, speak very clearly to the gate computer or it may send you to the wrong dimension. Tim 011: (fading) I will, Mother! Mother 011: Don't forget to change your oil every two months! Tim 012: (distant) Okay, Mom! Mother 012: AND BE SURE TO FIND A FUEL SOURCE AS SOON AS YOU ARRIVE! sfx: vehicle pulling away Mother 013: (crying) My little robot... Upgraded to adult so fast! Scene 3 (inside grass hut) Grant 012: Malcrum Malcrum 001: Yes, Grant, what is it? Grant 013: There is a matter which demands attention. Malcrum 002: (annoyed, he knows what's coming) And what would that be? Grant 014: The Fjord Village needs a defender, Malcrum. Malcrum 003: You think I don't know that, Grant? Grant 015: If you know it, then do something about it! Malcrum 004: What do you want me to do? You know full well that it's up to the Fjord Village to pick their own champion. Grant 016: (getting irritated) You can station someone there! Malcrum 005: (slowly, as if speaking to an idiot) That's not my job, that's the QUEEN'S job! Grant 017: The queen doesn't know your trainees. You do! You can put someone in charge of the Fjord village and the queen will not object because she knows how capable... Malcrum 006: (raising voice, comes in at "queen") And who shall I put there? F'nar? Desmond? How about little Pearl? Grant 018: (raising voice and talking over Malcrum) Don't make jokes, Malcrum, this is a very serious matter! Malcrum 007: (nearly shouting) I'm not making jokes! The last truly qualified warrior was Olivia and she replaced her sister Ophelia. You'll have to make do! (pause) Grant 019: (huffing) I have a great deal of respect for you, Malcrum. You have trained us well. But I cannot abide your reluctance to protect Pama's village. sfx: door opens Braze 001: HEY! Malcrum 008: Hello, Braze. Would you excuse us? Grant and I are having a private conversation. Braze 002: Waugh! everyone here private co'vashin. You fight! Malcrum 009: We're not fighting! Grant 020: (Simultaneously) We're not fighting! Braze 003: Not fighting? Stop not fighting! Braze say you go! stop yell! Grant 021: Very well, Braze. For now. (door closes) Braze 004: Why for make Malcrum mad? Grant 022: I wasn't trying to make Malcrum angry. Braze 005: Braze ferral, no stupid. You say "Pama Village". Pama dead. You no say "Malcrum kill Pama", but Malcrum hear. Grant 023: Is that what you think? Braze 006: Braze think. What Grant think? Grant 024: (joking) I think we never should have taught you to speak. Scene 4 (Sandbar) sfx: raking, waves Brim 001: (singing) And by the rivers of the plains I'll make my home there. And in the shadow of the mountain there will be a place for me. And I will spend my... hello... looks like the gate just opened. sfx: WHOOSH! (at about "be a place") Tim 013: Thank you. Hello, there. are you the ferry driver? Brim 002: No, I'm a gatherer. I was just gathering some sea salt. But I'll gladly take you across the channel on my raft. Tim 014: Thank you. My name is Tim. I'm from the robot world. Brim 003: (joking) Well, I assumed from your appearance that you weren't an elf. Here's the raft. Climb on. Tim 015: (embarassed) Heh... I guess it is pretty obvious that I'm a droid. Brim 004: Where are you headed, Tim? Tim 016: I'm not entirely sure, yet. I need to settle someplace with a fuel supply. Brim 005: What sort of fuel supply? Tim 017: Gasoline, preferably. Brim 006: I don't know what that is. Tim 018: If not gasoline... alcohol and vegetable oils would do. Brim 007: Alcohol... Is that like wine? Tim 019: Something like that. Brim 008: I know just where you should go. They make oil and wine at the Fjord Village. They keep orchards up on the clifftops, you see. Tim 020: sounds like just the thing. Scene 5 (underwater) Nageel 4 001: Halt! what have we here? Kemal 001: Mmm mm mmmmm! ("let me pass!") Nageel 4 002: Hah! You otters think you're so special, yet you can't even talk under the water. But all is not lost. You'll make a fine throw rug fer my den! Kemal 002: NM!! ("NO!") Nageel 5 001: Let 'im go. That's Kemal. The emperor's expectin' him. Kemal 003: hmm hmmm! ("he is") Nageel 4 003: Fine, mate. fine. I'll have plenty of otter pelts soon anyhow, eh? Ha ha ha heh heh! Nageel 5: har har har ho ho! Scene 6 (palace) Guard 001: Kemal of the otters to see you, your majesty. Emperor 001: send him in. Kemal 004: Mmmm Mmm-mm-mmm. ("You majesty") Emperor 002: Bring a bowl of air for our guest. (pause) Emperor 003: Here. Place this over your head. Kemal 005: (unemotional) Thank you, your majesty. Emperor 004: What news from the surface? Kemal 006: Your raiding party has confirmed what I suspected. The Fjord Village is weakened without its protector. Emperor 005: (oily) Weakened? Really? Then perhaps you would like to explain (heated) what happened to the entire party? Kemal 007: The Coastal Patrol was able to take up the slack. But that won't be a problem for long. There is dissension among the patrol because of this weakness. And if that doesn't prove sufficient, the trap is in place. Emperor 006: Excellent. Now. Tell me about the strengths and weaknesses of the king's castle. Kemal 008: (shocked) That wasn't part of our deal. Emperor 007: Well, now... perhaps I can change your mind. I'd like to introduce you to my special boys. sfx: clap sfx: growling (10 min) Emperor 008: Do you like them? I for one think that they are absolutely magnificent. Half nageel, half shark. One bite from their powerful jaws would tear an otter apart as easily as you would tear apart a crayfish. And I do believe it's their suppertime. They do look hungry, don't they? Kemal 009: Are you trying to threaten me? Emperor 009: Goodness, no. I'm sure these boys could find food on their own. The shores are ripe with tender morsels after all. They're capable of finding something tender and young. Aren't you, boys? Kemal 010: (disgusted) The castle entrance is constantly guarded by one kalan and one river wolf. The guards carry... scene 7 (castle) Narration: several days later, Tim the android has been summoned to appear before the king. He does not yet know the reason, and is rather nervous. Tim 021: I... I received a summons from the king? Rio 001: Go on in. He's waiting for you. Tim 022: (quietly) Wow. What a fortress. King 001: Ah, Tim. Tim 023: Your majesty... I'm afraid I'm not familiar with royal protocol. Should I be on all fours or... King 002: (dismissive) oh, pssh. Protocol is for humans and elves. Tim 024: Right. ...Sir. king 003: You may call me Mij. I've asked you to come here because I want to talk to you about a job. Tim 025: I see. No offense your... uh, Mij... but isn't that what the queen usually does? king 004: Generally. But I want to talk to you about joining the coastal patrol. Tim 026: I thought that was the queen's area as well. king 005: Normally, yes, but not in times of war. Tim 027: (alarmed) war, Sir? king 006: Keep your voice down, please. Yes, war. I have reason to believe that the nageel are active even now. (pause) The island and I have been conferring in my dreams, and what I have heard concerns me greatly. Whispers of treason... fighting among the patrol... shades of danger which no one can quite identify. All tied in somehow to the nageel. But I simply cannot bring it all together. Tim 028: I am at your service, sire. How can I help? king 007: In my dealings with robots, I have learned that all of you have certain abilities in common. Keen senses. Eidetic memory. acute powers of perception. I want you to join the patrol to be my eyes and ears. Find out exactly what's going on and why. Tim 029: I will of course comply with your wishes, Sire, but you should know that I am not a fighter. I'm a scholar and an explorer. That's why I came here. king 008: hm. I will make arrangements with the patrol. I will tell tham that because you are the youngest and greenest member, the others are to see that you do a minimum of fighting. Is that acceptable? Tim 030: Yes, sir. king 009: Report to Malcrum at your earliest convenience for orientation. You'll find him near the river village. Oh, and on your way out, would you ask Chippie to bring me some berries? I haven't eaten all day. Tim 031: Yes, Sir, your majesty! Scene 8 (orchard) Narrator 005: Things do not go easily for Tim. The next day, near the eastern gardens... Tim 032: (singing) 8-6-5-3-4 and 86534 was his name-o. There was a robot had a dog and... Tak 001: Hey! what are you doing to that tree? Tim 033: Oh, hello. I was just extracting some resin from this pine. I need it to help waterproof my systems. Tak 002: who told you that you could cut this tree? Tim 034: Is this your tree? I am sorry... Tak 003: We need these pine trees! Their boughs provide roofs for a lot of the houses around here. Tim 035: I assure you that I have not done significant harm to the tree. Tak 004: Poor baby, bleeding sap all over the place... What in the world are you anyway? You don't look or smell like an otter. Tim 036: (hurt) Well... I'm not technically an otter. I'm a lutraform android. sfx: wings flapping Tak 005: Go cut somebody else's trees, you nasty thing! Gabriel 005: Is there a problem here? Tak 006: This machine is attacking my pine trees! Tim 037: I did not attack them, I... Gabriel 006: Did you do this, Tim? Tak 007: You know him? Tim 038: I did. Gabriel 007: Tak, isn't this exactly how you cut maple trees when you're extracting sap? Tak 008: Well, yes, but... Gabriel 008: Your maple trees are fine. Why do you think your pine trees are in danger? Tak 009: Whose side are you on, Gabriel? Gabriel 009: I'm on nobody's side. Look, Tim is new here. He didn't know that these trees are yours. He was merely helping himself to what he needed, the same way we all do. Tak 010: well... Gabriel 010: Besides, this young creature is protecting your trees. He's a member of the coastal patrol. Tak 011: He is? I didn't realize. Tim 039: Well, I don't want to... Gabriel 011: He had his first confrontation this morning. Killed a zombie on his first day. Tak 012: Never let it be said I didn't support the patrol. Take all the resin you need. Tim 040: Thank... Gabriel 012: (interupting) Thank you. (pause) Tim 041: Thanks for your support, Gabriel. I d... Gabriel 013: Listen, machine, I'll back you up because you're a member of the patrol, but you'd better learn the rules around here. Just because we all share our resources doesn't mean you can just take whatever you want without asking. sfx: wings flapping Tim 042: (as gabriel is leaving) I'm sorry Gabriel, I... I didn't know. It's just so different from my world. I didn't know. scene 9 (Patrol HQ) Narrator 006: A meeting at the patrol headquarters proves no better... Grant 025: report. Olivia 006: There's been a great deal of trouble at the gate. Four zombie teams, two chifrews and some sort of backwards-slithering sea seprent. All within the last three days. Poffle 001: There have been at least twelve hit-and-run raids by the nageel. There haven't been any casualties, but the property damage has been massive. Tim 043: The damage has been especially bad in the reef village. Grant 026: Would you like to tell me why that is? Tim 044: presumably because it's closest to the Nageel city. Grant 027: and what have you done about the problem? Tim 045: Me? But sir, the reef village is Poffle's village. Grant 028: You are his closest ally. You need to be there to support him. Tim 046: I am if I can, but I really have no way of knowing... Grant 029: I'm not interested in excuses. Tim, I am not happy that you landed a position on the patrol without any previous combat experience. Malcrum 010: ...Or training... Grant 030: But as long as you're here, you are going to fight like a warrior. Do you understand? Tim 047: Yes, sir. I understand. Scene 10 (Fjord village) sfx: fire and heavy bubbling Tim 048: Six ounces? I can't live on that. There must be some way to increase the output of this thing. (fire and bubbling intensifies) Tim 049: That's right... Just a little tweak here... and another... sfx: dishes breaking Tim 050: GREMLINS! (throws objects while "swearing") GLITCHES! WYSIWIG! GIGO! SLAG! Olivia 007: I hope it's not my arrival that has you swearing like that. Tim 051: Olivia... How... what are you doing here? Olivia 008: You weren't at HQ for the latest debriefing. I came by to see if you're all right. Obviously, you're not. what's wrong? Tim 052: My still broke. Olivia 009: You can't make fuel without it, huh? Tim 053: No. Olivia 010: Have you thought about converting to solar batteries? Tim 054: no. Olivia 011: They'd be a lot less hassle, I'm sure. Tim 055: Yeah. Olivia 012: Something else is bothering you. Tim 056: Yeah. Olivia 013: Want to talk about it? Tim 057: Everyone seems to hate me. Olivia 014: Not everyone. I don't. Tim 058: You're the exception. Olivia 015: Who hates you? Tim 059: Grant. Malcrum. Gabriel. Flaire. Quarg. shade. Nereid. Braze. Olivia 016: Braze doesn't hate you. (pause) Everyone else, though, that's pretty much on the money. Tim 060: Is it because I'm a robot? It's because I'm a robot, isn't it? (20 min) Olivia 017: I'm pretty sure that isn't it. But... Tim 061: But what? Olivia 018: Well... you're always so serious. You try so hard at everything... training, maintainance, impressing Grant... Perhaps it would help if you loosen up. Tim 062: Loosen... but if I loosen up, I'll get water in my circuits. Olivia 019: Not like that, silly. I mean loosen up and have fun. like this... sfx: circus music Tim 063: That was impressive, but I believe that what you just did can only be achieved by a toon like yourself. Olivia 010: Well, unless you have six arms... But you could say... go play frisbee or ropeball on the beach. Tim 064: To strengthen social connections with those around me? Olivia 011: No offense, Tim, but that is such a robotic thing to say. No, because it's fun! Building social bonds is a nice side effect. Tim 065: Hmm.... Olivia 012: Just do something fun. I guarantee you'll feel better. Tim 066: what is that? Olivia 013: What's what? Tim 067: That smell... like fish and ozone. it's like... Electric eels! There's nageel attacking! Scene 11 (shore) Tim 068: We're here! Where are they? Olivia 014: Don't tell us they got away already! cook 001: Who? Tim 069: The nageel! We smelled them from my up in my cave. cook 002: No nageel here. Just me drying out this here eel jerky. Tim 070: Eel jerky? cook 003: And my wife's baking some chili-bread. Olivia 015: Oh. False alarm. sfx: upward splash Nageel 6 001: YARGH! What have we here? You wouldn't be cooking my cousins, would you? Olivia 016: Go back to the abyss before you get filleted yourself, scum. Nageel 6 002: And who's going to make me? You? Olivia 017: You bet I am! Nageel 6 003: I don't think so. You see... we learn. sfx: whip Tim 071: Olivia! Olivia 018: This rope... it's sticking to me like glue! Nageel 6 004: Chifrew tentacle. Thanks for dumping those creatures in the water, by the way. Tim 072: Glitches! Nageel 6 005: You killed my brother with a giant mallet. Now I am going to kill you, cursed drawing-thing. Let's see how you stand up to a chifrew-skin-tipped trident. Tim 073: You... go... get help! Nageel 6 006: I don't think anyone is going to come. You see, at this very moment, the entire nageel army is launching an attack on the island. Your king... in fact, all of you... are about to die. Tim 074: No! Nageel 6 007: And I myself am starting with this blue wench! Tim 075: NOOOO! sfx: metal being punctured Nageel 6 008: You stupid tin can! Get out of the way! Tim 076: I'll have you free of this tentacle in a moment. Glitches but it's cold! sfx: metal being punctured several times sfx: sparks Nageel 6 009: GET OUT OF THE WAY! Olivia 019: Tim! Tim 077: There. You're free! Go warn the others! Olivia 020: But Tim, you're hurt... Tim 078: Go! You can't save me! sfx: running Nageel 6 010: You miserable boat motor! You cost me my revenge! Tim 079: I'll cost you more than that. Nageel 6 011: What are you talking about? Tim 080: I can't let you get away. You will be destroyed. sfx: beeping Nageel 6 012: What can you do? You can hardly move. Tim 081: I will self-destruct in 3...2...1... Nageel 6 013: (sudden realization) Oh Z... sfx: Explosion Scene 12 Robot hospital Doctor 001: I've activated him. He's coming to now. Tim 082: Where am I? Doctor 002: You're in the hospital, in city zero-zero-four. Tim 083: The last thing I remember is self-destructing. Grant 031: We found your head in the orchards. It was mostly intact. Gabriel 014: So we brought it to your homeworld to see if you could be revived. Poffle 002: The doctors built you a new body. Tim 084: Olivia... is she all right? Grant 032: She's fine. She just wore herself out mobilizing the island to stop the nageel invasion. Tim 085: I... I can't move. Doctor 003: Be patient, Tim. I'm still installing your drivers. Grant 033: Tim... We uh... we... Gabriel 015: We owe you an apology. We've been treating you disrespectfully because... Tim 086: Because I'm a machine? Grant 034: What? No. That was never a factor. Poffle 003: We don't care about that. Grant 035: It was because we doubted that you were ever a serious warrior. Gabriel 016: The king told us to keep you out of the fighting. What were we supposed to think? Grant 036: But you took a trident for Olivia. You gave up your life to protect her. Poffle 004: From the neck down, anyway. Grant 037: Once you're recovered, I expect to see you at Patrol HQ. Tim 087: Yes, Sir! Doctor 004: All right now. If you've said all you have to say, I need you all to give us some room. I've got to calibrate this boy's drivers. Go on, now, shoo... Scene 13 (fjord) sfx: upward splash Tim 089: All clear down there. Olivia 021: Ahoy, Tim! Tim 090: Hello, Olivia! Er... I mean "wut wut". Olivia 022: Whatcha doing? Tim 091: I'm just checking the fjord floor for signs of nageels. Olivia 023: Very industrious. Tim 092: And I was having a good swim. Olivia 024: (grin in voice) Thought so. Tim 093: Want to play a little waterball? It's great way to build up agility and speed, not to mention reflexes. Olivia 025: It is at that. Tim 094: And it's a lot of fun. Olivia 026: How'd you like to take a ride instead? There's going to be a play down at the markets. I came to ask if you'd like to come. Tim 095: I'd love to. (25 min) Epilogue Oren 001: Hello, once again. I'm Oren Otter Tak 013: And I'm Tak. Oren 002: And it is now time for the educational part of our program. Tak 014: Yes. In the past three episodes, we have had were-humans, were-dolphins and were-eels. Oren 003: Ironically, the word "were" means "man", even though not all were-beasts turn into men. Tak 015: That's it? Oren 004: What do you mean? Tak 016: Well, this episode had so many important moral subjects in it, like tolerance and friendship and the importance of fun... Oren 005: Yeah, but we always end the show with something silly to take the edge off the drama. Tak 017: That wasn't silly. That was just... pedantic. Oren 006: In our next episode, meet a young otter named Chrissy who runs away from home to build the biggest slide on the island. Tak 018: (hurries) Next month, right here on Ottertunes. Shouldn't we at least say something about sharing? I mean I'm not really as stingy as I was in the show! Or the proper way to get sap from a tree? (closing theme fades in over Tak) Credits: This has been the Otter Island Radio show. Otter Island is a production of the Riverside Players and stars Oren Otter, Eala Dubh, Kaninus O'Farrel, John Winningham, Ashen Fox, Wanderer wolf, Martin Billany, Jude the Rat and ann Vole. This episode was written and directed by Oren Otter. It is partially based on "", a companion story by Jon Krupp. Additional sound engineering was provided by Eala Dubh, including music gratefully borrowed from Peter Howell of the BBC Radiophonic Workshop. Otter Island is made possible by the Pandora families of comics which may be seen at www.ottercomics.us and has been broadcast on the OtterTunes shoutcast radio network.